VIRTUAL MOANING

Don't bother reading this....I'm just going to moan and it will be boring.

I have had a headache for days, ibuprofen just isn't working anymore. Its my left eye....at least the redness that was there last week has gone now it just hurts.

I'm trying to be happy behind the bar but its that bloody smokey in here that I cant muster a smile. I hope my new glasses come tomorrow, I really need a break from my contact lenses.

Okay, moan over.

The chuffing beagle has nicked 7 raw sausages from the cupboard top whilst I was on the phone. This means of course it will be squitsville for him tomorrow. Have you ever tried to pick up dog poo when it is like soup? OMG, and he always does those ones when we are right at the front of the queue of traffic at the lights so everyone has to watch my pathetic attempt to bag splat.

I have had an idea though, what if I took a pack of smash with me or indeed wallpaper paste? Then I could sprinkle it on top, stir at it with a stick until it formed a solid. No, hang on, that would just make me sick.

Would you like to hear about the best shit Jeremy ever had? Unfortunatley no one saw this master piece.....

We walked up Buxton Road to get on the canal by the Puss In Boots. There is a bridge there over it with white railings. Jeremy twirled around with his dangerous end pointing between the bars and curled one off into the canal 15 feet below. Surely the best poo stick story ever! It made a right splash. Alas no passing narrow boat nor on lookers in sight.

He ate half a yellow sponge cloth yesterday. I forgot about it until he shat bright yellow on the Middlewood Way today, it took me a while to figure out what it was!

Forgive me, Im not usually so facinated with dog shit, but not that much has happened today. Fingers crossed my life may become a little more interesting tomorrow. Then again, it probably wont.