HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

No its not today......but Im in talks with the Sidebottom to see if he will play here on my birthday (3rd Janvier folks) as we have sold out already for 5th. Its looking good. Jelly and ice cream all round folks x

SIDEBOTTOM SELL OUT

Yes, all the tickets have gone.

In other news, I have decided to scrap the pearly queen idea for the concert tomorrow night. Instead I am opting for flat cap, that brown waistcoat from river island, black shorts tights and heels. Oh, and a scarf tied the way that cockney market stall holders do. Cor blimey guv'nor, I'm gonna look like a right bloody charlie innit?!

HARDLY THE GREAT ADVENTURE

The bloody beagle ran away last night, someone left the back gate open.
I went out and shouted for him, why I dont know cos he never comes when I call him.
So I slept on the settee so if someone rang then I would hear the phone.

Someone then rang in the morning to see if I had lost a dog, guess where he was? Trying to get in to Subway. In 4 hours he had only made it as far as down the road. Not very adventurous, Benson would have been in Wales by then if he had have escaped.

I was waiting for my ebay bids to realise so I sat up and drank with a man I met last Monday (who I then had a filthy dream about.) Its a fate thing. So I wrote down my number and said that he might need it if he was ever going to get around to asking me out...it was getting late and I needed to sleep.

IM NOT A HANDBAG GIRL

I wish I was. I dont mean that website place, I mean I dont carry a handbag. I still have hundreds of them mind.

I think its because I never really go out. Cos Im always here I dont need to carry stuff about with me. So when I do I lose things cos I dont usually carry anything with me.

WTF am I moaning about? Oh, thats it. I have lost my hairbrush. I went into town to buy another but I cant find the same one (its a dead good one that doesnt pull out my extentions, which have nearly all dropped out now anyway.) Think I may have left it in Lindsays brothers car when he drove us to Amy Winehouse in Liverpool. This is quite funny as she never uses a hair brush (by the looks of it) and so now I am evolving into her - well with matted hair anyway. I dont however weigh 5 stone.

Talking of weight, I started back at Slimming World last week for the 3rd time. I was going to be all dedicated and the first day I wrote out my menu sheet thing. You are allowed 10 syns a day. Things were looking good by 5pm as I had had no syns. Then, circumstances forced me another way and me and Claire went out. One 35ml vodka and diet coke are 4 syns. I did some rough calculations and I must have had 68 syns on day one. Im not holding out much hope for my weigh in tomorrow.

This week should be ok. The only big drinking day is Thursday when I am going to see Chas N Dave in Stockport (once I have made a pearly queen dress for me to wear). I need one of those ChasNDave Tshirts with the playboy bunny on it wearing a flat cap. I will purchase one there.

Im looking forward to Friday, I have an appointment with locally renowned medium Ursula at 7.30. Im kind of looking forward to it. Hope she doesnt tell me some dead dude says I should stay in Macc and fook off my Canada plans. That would cause conflict.

Then my tree goes up on Sunday and I will spend the week preparing for Franks visit. He is on Paul O'Grady tonight. Fortunatley Paul O'Grady isnt on it. He bugs me.


Cahs N Dave signed my mate Claires tits once. It was hilarious

OKAY, YOU KNOW HOW THEY SAY.....

That you shouldn't open emails from people you dont know. Is this really true?
I dont bother with ones that offer me drugs or whatever to make my penis larger, not having one lessens my interest in this. They usually read something like this

dear p*************@aol.com enlarge your penis with hjvgdfhbahi;gh;ihjnJKL;DNKJBDLBF

But I have had one from someone which when opened (no warning notice popped up) read thus...

And eight. And that my meat which run like

It has an attatchment that I have not downloaded but I am intreagued.

Does it have virus written all over it? Ive had one of them before, I have also had some dodgy guy pretending to be paypal emailing me. I thwarted that attempt.

I was a victim of credit card fraud last year when some cuntie succesfully managed to bill me for their aol connection for 6 months without me noticing. Im more careful nowadays (I am also unable to use my credit cards,....this helps!! ha ha ha!)

Yes, I ended up a drinking and stuff last night. Argued about dentists, discussed Chas N Dave and drank hot cider infront of the fire. Magic Mushrooms on a Sunday? God's day? How rude. I told this man I would make him leave if he kept on throwing beer mats at customers. He denied throwing beer mats a customers. When I sat down I realised he hadnt infact thrown any beer mats.

Strong shit indeed!!

Umm, not really living the dream am I? 7 months to go though...

WATCH OUT, BEAGLES ABOUT....

Well its been a while people. Infact I bet no one even looks at this page anymore...

Its Sunday afternoon, I have just embarrasingly ripped open the carton of Innocent juice that I was drinking (blackcurrant,acerola,cherries and rosehips) and licked it clean. It was whilst doing this that I decided to ressurect the beagle blog.

Although I am still annoyed about the whole Paul situation I got in I am no way near as bothered by it.

I never felt at home at the secret splinter blog I started and my saving the pub blog doesnt need to be written on as the pub has indeed been saved.

What with all that, the fact that this one is a year old and that this will be (hopefully) my last 7 months in the country...

I have decided to return. Well I will return to blogging after I have washed my hair and served a few boozehounds with swill...With any luck I shall retun tonight instead of getting invloved with some vodka...depends who comes in.

Not long to go now. How excited am I? I've got Frank Sidebottom (and Little Frank) coming here to turn on my tree lights a week on Tuesday.

He will play two 50 minute sets and the home made tickets I made have nearly sold out.

So excited, so excited, so excited, so excited, so excited, so excited....

In fact, so excited I typed that out and didnt copy and paste it, thats how excited I am.....