WHEN PEOPLE HAVE TIME TO BLOG ON HOLIDAY

Yes, it may sound sad but I need a break from the sun. Its friggin baking out again today yet still, try as I might I do believe I am going paler rather than darker. That is the thing with having freckley skin, you just get a few more freckles.

Well, what can I say, were I am at this current moment in time is undoubtably the finest place on the planet. The villa is untrue, we are the first to stay in it and its mint. 5 bedrooms, pool, beachfront, fuck off tv and sound system and the staff here are psychic and know what you want before you know you wabt it. You should check out the kitchen, wipes the floor with any thing I have seen on MTV cribs.

Well, thats Samui. It just happens to be a full moon tonight so we are getting the boat over to the full moon party. This will be my first proper night out since I have been here. Im the same as normal - whenever Im on holiday I usually prefer to laze about and go to bed early. I cant drink in hot weather, well I can drink- of course I can drink...thats my problem. i drink far too much and spend the next day throwing up. I did that in China already last week and Im not too keen to go there again. Bollocks if I seem boring or whatever, I stopped doing things that I didnt want to do a long time ago.

Hong Kong was cool, busy and kind of pricely but cool. Im back there on Saturday but I, of course do not want to leave here.Bangkok wasnt as good as I remembered it, I was caught up in the romanticness of squaller, it is a shit hole. But then Samui is better than I remembered it.

Anyway, thats enough of this....I'm chilled after my 5 quid massage so I think I'll go for a swim.

I'm just hoping that when I get back to the UK I get some good news and a date for when we leave. I have realised, I cant wait to go to Canada.I need my life to move forward.

WHEN I GO GLOBAL

Woo and yeah, Im off to Hong Kong to meet Marisa in a few hours. I've packed everything and am just waiting to go. I cant wait to snap up some Chinese bargins, I'm after a ipod touch (both of my ipods are now dead) some fancy leather boots - as I never found any at Weston Park Game Fair on Sunday. Oh, Sunday, god what a nightmare, I managed to loose my purse twice like a proper dickhead. It was playing charades in the POW from the tv listings page that made me forget it there overnight. Fortunatley I got it back!

Then, the plan is me and Marisa are in Hong Kong/China til Friday or Saturday, then spending the night in Bangkok and meeting Kay, Linds, Chris and Claire Johnson at the airport at 7am then we are all going to our kick ass villa.


Then back to HK on saturday night then I get backon Tuesday morning. So excited, so excited, cant even blog. Im rubbish at it these days anyway. Laters x

WHEN LIFE IS SLOW

Now I haven't been going out for a while I realise I have absolutley nothing to say. No pub gossip, no Tesco complaints, no nothing. I'm beginning to get bored. Infact, forget anything I may have said regarding not going out, fcuk it, I'm having a few early doors on Friday but I will go out on Saturday night. Bollocks to it. Infact, I think we are having an oyster fest on Friday in POW from 5ish if anyone fancies one.

Where was ? Oh yes, dullness....

I worked in Crewe today so got to drive about Cheshire for a while.God Crewe looks boring, its well flat isnt it? That big guy who comes in with the Copes and is, sorry was the last to leave on Saturday nights (hes a bit rough, girlfriend drinks Bacardi and diet coke and wears blue mascara.Exactly.) came all over road rage with us as we cut him up at Monks Heath crossroads. Probably the most exciting thing that happened today. I'm working in Alderley Edge tomorrow, that is all I know.

Woo-Hoo, 13 days til my Asian Vacation. Still not sure of my final destination yet.

WHEN DEFENSE CONDITIONS ARE LOWERED

Ok, I admit I may have over reacted by going to DEF CON 1 with my heightened blog security earlier. I blame Hollyoaks, something on it the other day made me go all paranoid.
Anyway, I have had a word with myself and sent out random invites. If you have had one by mistake I'm sorry,my email address book is as unorganised as my ridiculous living out of a suitcase life at the minute. You don't want to read this anyway, its pure garbage.

I actually learnt something today, quite random I know but I feel its worth sharing.
Did you know that if your stairs don't have a lip on the top bit that you stand on then they are illegal?? "Get out of town woman" I hear you say but let me tell you its a big fat F.A.C.T.
I also learnt that the wooden bits on the side of houses which run from the fascias from the front and back are called barge boards, but that's boring so forget I mentioned it.


FYI...
Seemingly dogs can travel in planes to Canada all year round, I thought my Mum made that up when she said it was March-October, so anything I have said before about that is a lie.

WHEN I GO 007

Sitemeter has made me paranoid so I have changed my settings.I dont know if it will work or not, I might go public again later but while certain people are trying to find me I think I will limit access to friends only.....

god knows why strangers would want to read it anyway.

WHEN CIGARS ARE NOT NEEDED

Nearly forgot....Jeremy is not a father.
She had a phantom pregnancy.

I wonder if phantoms are easier to housetrain than the beagle was?

WHEN PEOPLE HIT THEIR THUMB WITH A HAMMER

Ow. Does it hurt? Damn right it hurts. I popped the blood blister with a needle so it looks better at least. Thing is, its the thumb I trapped in the door last week. Ow. Not a good time for my thumb I can tell you.

In other news, Im going to Hong Kong to meet Marisa who I have not seen for years and years on 18th for 2 weeks. We are going to that 6 storey shopping centre in Shenzhen where they sell all the knock off bargains dirt cheap. Handbags, jewelery and boots...you know the stuff. Sounds so good we are staying there overnight! Then we are planning on going somewhere else for a week or so as I'm being robbed of sun this year now I'm not going to Canada until autumn/winter. I'm in need some rays before I go in to -30 land.

I dont even feel like going out at all at the moment.All I seem to do is explain why I am still here and it gets a little monotonous.



Anyway, what if the Hokey Cokey really is what its all about?