The blog is dead

Yes, although Jeremy Beagle is very much alive this blog is very much dead.
I do have a new one in the works if anyone out there is remotley interested......email me @ portersprince@live.ca and I'll give you the link (I havent actually got it going as yet, but shoud have it started by the end of the week.

Its been immense (as Annie would say)

WHENEVER YOU'RE FEELING LONELY....

....or you're gettin' in a stew,
Just lend your ear - come over here, and, man, here's what you do,

If you've got the blues,
then I've got some news,
join in the fun in your blue suede shoes.
With the holiday rock, the holiday rock,
the ho-de-ho-de-hi-de-hi holiday rock.


Sorry about that. Its my third night of sleeping with my mask on tonight. I totally love it. I feel just like Yvonne from Hi-De-Hi (although mine is not as posh as I remember hers being, its the one you get free if you fly with B.A.). Its just blue and not frilly.

Which reminds me of the greatest joke of all time...
"The last time I went on holiday, I flew with BA.
It was terrible. He kept shouting: ‘You crazy foo’. I ain’t gettin’ on no plane!’"


Anyway, I digress...

The blinds on my window in my bedroom let an amazing amount of daylight in which wakes me up every morning around 5, I may have mentioned this before.Its tres non bon. But now with my black out sleep mask thing going to sleep has improved a thousand fold. Infact, I'm in bed already and its only just 10 o'clock. It works a treat.

I never understood it as a kid when I saw Yvonne from Hi-De-Hi wear one....the sleep mask.To be honest, I hated her and Barry in it. I loved the child hating Punch and Judy man, cant remember his name - Mr Peacock or something, I of course liked Fred the best and Peggy. Loathed the Welsh one and didnt understand what that old jockey man was doing in it. Looking back, was Jeffery gay in it? You dont understand gay when you are a kid do you. Maybe they do now but I cant remember thinking Larry Grayson was gay when I watched The Generation Game, I just thought he was hilarious. Steven Carrington in Dynasty is when I found out what there was such a thing as gay. Anyway, Im off the point now...

Its time to don my eyemask and go to bed. Im so excited!!!

Then again, I might try and find some vintage Hi-De-Hi on youtube first...


Hi-de-hi-de-hi, ho-de-ho-de-ho, go go go do the holiday rock
Hi-de-hi-de-hi, ho-de-ho-de-ho, go go go do the holiday rock
Yeah......................

BEAGLE 0 GEESE 1

Oops, guess who left her bedroom door open when she went to work?

Seems Jeremy went for the geese one by one and piled them up in the front room. Luckily they were unharmed (either the beagle no longer destroys things or the geese really are hard as nails).

You will be happy to know that they are all safe except Ramone is a little dirtier than before.

I've just finished work at the bar, I got to close at 11 which is always a bonus cos even though I did bugger all yesterday Im feeling a little tired. I'm going to try and sleep with one of those blindfold eye masks things on tonight cos my blinds let the light in my room well early.

AND IF YOU COMPLAIN ONCE MORE, YOU'LL MEET AN ARMY OF GEESE

Its all coming together....

It's been many years since I first wanted an army of geese.

Let me introduce Raoul, Carlos, Sanchez, Mendoza, Jesus, Ramone and Gomez. My first ever goose army. Yes, dont worry I know they aren't real. I was there when found them in the Liquidation Store. Actually, if Im honest Jim made the discovery...I'd been sidelining 'Project Army Of Geese' for so long now that I had forgotten about it. We named them over lunch in Kabos with a Sharpie marker pen. Raoul is already proving himself to be a natural leader and outed Sanchez who now sports a rainbow tank top.


Raoul has a quiet word with Jesus (how do you do accents on this keypad?) telling him that he has taken his Usher listening a bit too far with his ridiculous pantyhose head gear. Raoul was imagining the army to be more of a West Side Story Sharks thang and less of a crack smoking R&B dirty ass ho thang.
Raoul applying some pressure to Gay Sanchez.

Iwould take these bad boys out on the road today but its raining, and although farmers everywhere are rejoicing it means I am staying indoors. So I bathed the beagle and am making a curry.

Its not all playing with hispanic gangsta geese you know.....

OW

Blimey, I just heard that Miss Johnson had a riding accident and broke both her ankles, bloody hell. Apparentley shes in hospital and gets operated on in the week. Poor lady, I cant even begin to imagine how much that must hurt.

And to think I was moaning about the bite on my arm (which to be fair has swollen up pretty bad), but still, two broken ankles? Friggin hell.

Its a long weekend here so I am enjoying the long weekend. Got a bit sunburnt on Saturday while walking the hound around the dam. Dont thin I'll go that way again, I have removed 4 ticks off him so far this week - and I think thats from going around there. I went to Clearwater Lake later on , I havent been there for 23 years, it was nothin glike I remembered it. I must have been a smaller 10 year old than I remember being cos it looked alot smaller than I remember.

I'm going to hang out with Jim while he does his farming stuff tomorrow. Seeding or something like that, I'm not sure. But I like driving around in tractors anyway so should be fun.

I cant stop thinking about poor Johnson...

I aim to return to normal blogging this week, I have just gone off it a bit at the minute, thats all.

HAIRBRAIDER

I'm doin my hair braider,
she makes it look just like spaghettay....

That R Kelly....he's still got it!!!

Ok, so I helped seed our vegetable garden today.
We did rows of radish, swiss chard, lettuce, peas, beans, onions, corn, zucchini, potatoes, dill, parsley, celery, cucumber, carrots, beetroot and a whole load of other stuff I cant remember. Curly even has a little tractor and a seeder so it was well easy. Im so excited , I cant wait until I can just go into the garden for my tea!!

Arthur Fowler eat your heart out.

ARTHUR FOWLER

I am, or at least I will be.